Women Winning Wednesday

"Rest when you're weary.  Refresh and renew yourself, your body, your mind, your spirit.  Then get back to work." - Ralph Marston

Happy Women Winning Wednesday!!  As I mentioned before I'm celebrating mothers all month long!  All of the Women Winning posts this month has been put together with mothers in mind.  We started out with Resiliency which is important for all of us to cultivate.  Then we talked about Reconciliation because life is too short to not forgive!  We only have one mother and she will never be perfect so why not forgive?  Today we are focusing on R~E~N~E~W~A~L!!  

As mothers we can easily lose ourselves, the core of who we are trying to balance everything in our lives!  I asked the awesome motivator and founder of Metamorphosis Women's Encounter, Monique to share her thoughts on this subject.  Her organization's goal is to see women transformed so who better to share with us?!

Monique, as mothers and women in general, we tend to put ourselves last.  What is renewal to you and why is this important for mothers to do (often)?

Renewal is the process of making like new, restore to freshness and vigor, or perfection, to begin again, to replenish , and or rejuvenate. Renewal is not only important for mothers to do but for us women as a whole. It is true we own many hats of responsibility and to perform properly in each of these roles it requires us to make multi-decisions along with multi-tasking to get and that accomplished. Managing life alone is a job and requires work…actually a lot of dedication in addition to that work if you want to maintain structure, remain organized, and create a wholesome environment for your family.  We can get so entangled in our hat wardrobe switching them on and off by just going with the busyness of our lives until we just may lose ourselves and dismiss what makes us…us.  When we finally decide to seek self-love we become discouraged because we don’t know where to begin to fulfill our own desires. Renewal is important to simply be in tune with our authentic selves and to live a well-balanced life to enjoy everything we have been blessed with…being single, a wife, mother, daughter, and friend. Renewal allows us to take on the bitter sweetness of life without losing control.

You are a wife, mother, full time employee and founder of Metamorphosis.  How do you make sure you stay renewed?

   

I am a Metamorphosis! What that means to me is continual transformation going from glory to glory on my life's journey. I desire to live a refreshed and renewed life. Yes! I rock many hats throughout my day and it is easy to feel bombarded and overwhelmed when you have so many demands and people depending on you for support. The first thing I do to remain renewed is pray. I take all my concerns, thoughts, and petitions to God, this relieve my soul. I have developed a relationship with the Lord. Not only that...I have learned to trust Him with my life. Trusting alone renews your strength to confidently move forward. I also have learned the importance of a wellness regimen which consist of eating well and exercising daily which boost my energy to thrive in my daily responsibilities, keeps me sexy,and strengthens my self worth because I am caring for me. Lastly, I listen to my inner self and take heed to when its time to relax, decline an invitation when necessary (don' need to attend every function) and make time for me to do things I love that bring me joy. Renewal allows you to be in tune with You which opens your mind to knowing whats best for you.

You desire to see real transformation in women and aim to do this through Metamorphosis, what advice can you offer women to purposely take time to renew themselves? 

 

As a woman who has overcoming the destruction affects of abuse, neglect, homelessness, rape, and hopelessness I can't stress enough how important it is to renew yourself daily. Through the process of renewal I have simply morphed beautifully into the CEO woman of my life managing marriage, motherhood, full-time employment, and starting a business with the trials of life all in between. Renewal began with a desire to want more for my life and family and to end the cycle of destruction that plagued my family. I encourage you to evaluate where you are and envision where you desire to be. Write it down and begin with prayer and carving out time to relax to clear your mind. Research methods to renew your mind, body, and spirit. One way to be renew is joining support groups, subscribe to empowering blogs, and removing drama and distractions from your life. Take courage and erase the picture someone else drew for you and recreate your own. Take a leap of faith and Live renewed, refreshed, rejuvenated with vigor to the fullest. After all we only get one life to live why not live it at your Best!

I don't know about ya'll but I'm renewed just from Monique sharing her thoughts!!  Thank you sis!  For more information about Metamorphosis visit her website and go like her Facebook Page!  

Don't wait, renew yourself starting today!

 Seasoned with Grace,

QueenZadia

My Secret Affair

Singing: I've been cheat'n, I've been cheat'n; I get all flabby when that sugar gets up in me.. (in the tune of Drunk in Love)! As the saying goes 'you are what you eat'!  And right about now I'm full of chips, cakes, wine, and more junk!  This secret love affair with processed, sugary, salty, junk food has to end!  Just a few months ago I was getting rid of my shrinking kangaroo pouch, now I've taken like 10 steps backwards!

On this healthy lifestyle journey I have had no problems with the fitness part of it!  I absolutely love (and I do mean love) to workout!  There are days when I don't feel like working out but I always talk myself into it.  The eating healthy part is almost completely opposite!  While I've gotten much better with my eating habits I still struggle with consistently eating with my goals in mind!  I refuse to continue down this road so I'm going to get myself back on track TODAY!

When we mess up we can stay in the mess or we can clean ourselves up and move forward.  Here's my plan to get back on track with consistently eating healthy most of the time!

Easter is when I noticed my affair.. It only got worse from there! 

(darn chocolate cake & banana pudding)!

Identify the Issue!
I'm an emotional eater!  I know these unhealthy eating habits and cravings are directly tied to the fact that I really miss my mom!  I've been trying to be happy and strong just like she would want me to be.  I've been all smiles acting as if it's all good, not really allowing myself to just feel the pain and grieve.  I started to really mask my pain on her birthday (March 31st).  I didn't notice how out of control my indulgences were getting until shortly after Easter!  I know how easy it is for me to 'eat my emotions' so this is something I have to stay conscience of and continue to work on overcoming.  I plan on journaling more and letting my family know when I'm really missing my mom.  Their listening ear will help much more than a bowl of life cereal (may not sound too bad but I've been eating way too many bowls a day- all the milk is showing in my boobs which I"m loving).

I will defeat this!

Get Rid of Excuses!
I was almost excusing my cheating saying, 'I deserve this' or 'I workout hard' knowing dang well I can't out exercise a bad diet!  I also stopped using myfitnesspal to track my meals using the excuse of I messed up my 100 day streak for the second time.  Then I used the 'I don't have time' to track my meals excuse!  Finally, I was using the excuse of 'I'll get back on track tomorrow'!  I've seen too many 'tomorrows' come and go!  No more excuses for excuses for me.

Track All Meals!
Speaking of myfitnesspal, I am re-commiting to tracking all of my food!  Studies show that people who track what they eat are more likely to be successful in losing weight and keeping it off.  I plan on being in the keeping it off category!

Get Back on Track with a Jumpstart Meal Plan
When I got off track with consistently eating healthy after my mom passed in October I decided to complete the 21 Day Daniel Fast.  It helped me get rid of all of my cravings for junk food and also helped build my faith!  I thought hard about doing it again this time but my goal is different.  When I started the Daniel Fast back in January I was aiming for transformation inside-out.  This time I just want to get rid of this extra belly fat I've added and to get back on track with my goal of leaning out and reducing my fat percentage.  I searched Pinterest and found the below lean out meal plan that I'm going to use starting today through Sunday.  If I get the results I'm looking for, from there I'm going to go back to one of my healthy meal plans.  If I don't get the results I want, I may do the Daniel Fast but just 10 days this time!

I'm replacing cottage cheese with Greek yogurt.. Have any of you tried this?

This is the first time I've ever prepped my meals for the week!  I always have a plan in mind but I've never prepped because I tend to eat based on what I'm in the mood to eat!  Even though I eat the same food for the most part, I view meal prepping as restrictive...  We shall see if I continue to prep my food a week ahead!  Either way, I will continue to have a plan in place!

Pictured: 3 days of meals excluding 3rd lean protein & protein powder

Eat According to Goals
I really want to flatten my tummy!!  I don't necessarily want to have a six-pack but I do want to achieve my goal of a flat belly.  I know this is directly tied to what I eat.  Also, my ultimate goal is to be completely healthy.  I truly believe that certain foods contribute to diseases like breast cancer.  I'm not saying I will never eat a piece of cake because I don't believe in restricting foods 100%.  We all know the quote 'One unhealthy meal won't make you unhealthy just like one healthy meal won't make you healthy'!  All we need to do is plan our meals according to our goals (including our indulgences) and stay focused on that plan!

"Eat to meet long-term goals, not short-term satisfaction!"

"Don't Give up what you want most for what you want now!"

In addition to the steps above I plan to just move on mentally, period!  It's done, the muffin top is there, my boobs are bigger (yay:), I messed up yet again but life goes on!  I'm going to drink a lot of water and stay focused on my goals!

Remember what goes on in the dark comes to light!!  My cheating has definitely come to the light.  I have a picture to prove it and I will be sharing it (when I flatten my belly back lol)!

What do you do to stay on track?  Please share!

Seasoned with Grace,

QueenZadia

Women Winning Wednesday

From the time I thought I was grown up until my late 20s I thought my mom was too soft!  I used to think how can you 'let' people do you like that?!  I used to view her kind and meek spirit as a weakness!  I watched my mom forgive wrong doings that I would be like 'hell naw' (in my country voice & I'm so serious)!  I used to watch her treat people kindly who I thought deserved the same mistreatment they were dishing out!  I'm glad I finally saw her real strength!  She rarely ever let anyone's actions or any of her experiences change her beliefs or her behavior.  She knew who she was and what she believed which is true strength!  This wasn't always the case though.

If you read my last blogpost you know my mom was given away at birth and experienced unthinkable hurt and pain.  For years she was angry and bitter at her birth mom.  My mother knew who her natural parents were from the time she was a child.  She was angry that her parents had kids after she was born and kept them.  She used to question, how could they have 11 kids and she was the only one given away?  I remember her telling me of the time she was walking down a street and my grandmother was walking towards her on the same street; my mom quickly crossed to the other side of the street to avoid her.  She did not want anything to do with her.

Thankfully this was not how her story ended!  She forgave, released all of her anger and even reconciled with my grandmother!  It wasn't until I was older that she told me stories- to show me you can overcome anything.  All of that pain helped her fulfill her purpose!  She left a legacy that matched her beliefs and core values and that makes her a winner!

She showed us to stay rooted in grounded in God!

Have you been hurt by your mother?  If so, let it go.  There is no hurt that God can't heal.  At the end of the day, we are not what happened to us, we are the choices we make.  Choose to forgive, choose to move on, choose to reconcile and live the life you were purposed to live.  I'll leave you with a portion of Raise Up lyrics by Ledisi:

When judgment day comes, have you given your best?

Has the world been changed by the love that you left?

Forgive those who trespassed against you

Rise through the pain, let it go

What happened is done, it's time to live again

Rase up & Reconcile!!

Seasoned with Grace,

QueenZadia

Motherhood - The Gift of Grace

Each time He said, "My grace is all you need. 

My power works best in weakness." (2 Corl 12:9 NLT)

My mother was given away to a couple who could not have kids when she was a baby.  The couple was well off so you would think she would've had a great life!  Her life was far from great.  She was mistreated to the point of only having two pair of panties.  At the age of 12 she was pregnant with her adopted dad's baby!  To know my mom you would never think she came from an environment like this.  The way she loved us and everyone she came in contact with was uncommon.  If I had not heard the stories of her childhood I would have thought she came from a loving family.  How can someone who experienced so much hurt and hatred, lovingly raise children completely different?  I believe it's grace!  

That's the beauty and wonder of grace.  In spite of our past, mistakes, or issues, God's grace is right there waiting on us to receive it!  All of our experiences (good, bad, or indifferent) seasons us with grace!  We can be great moms because of grace.  I was 15 years old when I had my first son.  Yes, 15 years old!  Of course I've made many mistakes and have even apologized to him so many times for all of mistakes parenting him!  I would think to myself, my poor son!  The issue I used to beat myself up over was how I used to yell at him when he was doing homework as if that was going to make him do any better.. "IF YOU DON"T GET THIS RIGHT I'M GOING TO BEAT YOU!"  Yes, I yelled just like that, used phrases like that and would even whoop him if he didn't get it!  But God's grace showed me a better way.  When we know better we do better! 

  

Before we were born God chose us and called us by his marvelous grace (Gal. 1:15).  If you are a mother, it is meant to be!  It doesn't matter if you're married, single, young or seasoned; none of us are 'too' anything for God's grace!  His grace is everything we need!  His amazing grace prevents us from pulling our hair out or having a nervous breakdown!  His supernatural grace carries us through the storms when our kids are 'acting a fool' forgetting how we raised them!  His wonderful grace covers all of the guilt and shame of the mistakes we make as mothers.  His mind-blowing grace helps us love when we want to hate, speak gracefully to our children when want to cuss them out!  It is His grace that will continue to keep us.  All we have to do is be open to receive it!  And when our hearts are open to receive His grace, we can't help but give it!

My graceful mom, sisters and I March 2013!

Motherhood is a blessing and a calling no matter the circumstances of us becoming a mother!  Yes it can feel like a burden at times trying to balance everything and being the best mom we can be.  Just know that when we feel weak, overwhelmed, helpless, insecure, guilty, discouraged, or challenged, His Grace is Sufficient!  In every season and situation, grace is everything we need!  Freely receive it and freely give it.

Seasoned with Grace,

QueenZadia